Welcome to the Marriage and Martinis’ Friday Five!
5) Parenting: Loving Your Children vs. Accepting Them
In the Two Dads and Three Girls interview from this past Monday, I spoke a lot about Andrew Solomon, who is an LGBTQ advocate, TED speaker, and author. After coming out to his parents, he faced a horrible identity crisis because his parents simply could not accept him for who he was. In his book and beautiful Hulu documentary, Far From The Tree, he explores all different types of families in which the child’s “horizontal identity” (listen to the podcast episode for more about that) makes it more difficult for the parents to identify with their child. He observes all different families, from one in which a child is severely autistic, to one in which a child was born with dwarfism, and one in which the child is in prison for a horrific crime. The similar thread through all of them though? A parent's love for a child is consistent, but accepting that child is a whole other idea.
4) The Anxiety Episode
This coming Monday we have an extremely vulnerable and personal episode for you that highlights my debilitating anxiety and OCD. At 26-years-old I was told by a doctor to go off of my anxiety medication so I could "safely" get pregnant. The results of this advice sent me into a horrible spiral down a path of mental and emotional disarray. I quit my job, moved back in with my parents, and cut myself off from the outside world, all while pregnant with my first child. Adam could not understand what was happening, and I was certain he was going to leave me. Make sure you are subscribed to the podcast so you can be among the first to hear our incredibly intimate story.
3) “Forgiveness is a journey, not a destination.”
The love I received on a post from this week on instagram about my struggle with forgiveness was truly overwhelming. Someone actually pointed out after I couldn’t remember where I heard that quote that it was Karamo on Queer Eye who said that. It struck me, hard. We need to be patient with ourselves and remember that forgiveness is something that is ongoing. It’s not a race, and it’s not a finish line to be crossed. I think I will be working towards relinquishing these feelings for the rest of my life. Let’s be forgiving of ourselves and remember that forgiveness is not something tanglibe that we can just hand over to people.
2) Marriage and Martinis takes on Los Angeles!
Adam and I are heading to LA for our first official Marriage and Martinis business trip in two weeks. We have so many new things coming your way and we cannot wait to share everything with you! Thank you so much for your ongoing support and for helping us to grow the communtiy. If you haven’t yet rated and reviewed on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts, please take a moment and do that. We are so grateful for each and every one. Also, share an episode with a friend whom you think might enjoy the podcast (hopefully someone with a great sense of humor who is also completely inappropriate). I’m always so excited when my friends and family share new podcasts with me, and it’s how I’ve discovered all of my favorites.
1) Date Night Questions: Achieving More Happiness With Life Coach Amy
What do you do in your life that gives you “flow” (makes you forget all sense of time and gets you fully immersed in what you’re doing)?
Do you have three people in your life with whom you feel fully connected and who provide you with a sense of unconditional love? Who are they?
If you meditate, how do you feel it helps you? If you don’t meditate, would you be interested in trying it together? Talk about a plan to maybe do this in the not-so-distant-future.
Does your family currently do any type of charity/activism together? If so, how does it help you all to bond and feel more peace? If not, what is a charity or cause that you might want to research doing some volunteer work for? This type of activity is known to spark happiness and contentment in both adults and children alike.
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