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Reaching Out To Reconnect

Updated: Jul 6, 2021

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5) Last week on our “Disconnection” episode, Adam and I discussed how the pandemic has made it really hard for us to connect. As Gary John Bishop told me in our episode about his book, “Unf*ck Yourself,” sometimes the key is to start doing more of what you wish your partner was doing. So, my goal these next few weeks is going to be to reach out more to Adam in small ways. Yes, some of it does sound cheesy, but I’m also sort of looking forward to putting in the extra effort. Here are some ideas of small ways I’m going to reach out so we can maybe feel a little more connected even when we have three kids home 24/7:

  • Leave a note in his car when he leaves for work

  • Send him a gratitude text out of the blue

  • Give him a compliment I’ve never given him before

  • Reach over to hold his hand when we’re watching TV or just talking

  • Make sure we embrace for more than ten seconds during the day (I know it doesn’t sound like much, but right now this is where we’re at)

4) Valentine’s Day is coming up and we have some amazing brands you are going to love, and some incredible giveaways, so make sure you keep checking Instagram (our feed and our stories). This year Valentine’s Day hits differently, and I know so many of us are looking for ways to remind our loved ones we haven’t seen in a while that we’re thinking of them and keeping them close to our hearts. Adam and I have a stellar lineup of creative and thoughtful ways we can express how much we love and miss those important people in our lives. Stay tuned…

3) In case you missed it….

With the start of the New Year, we are being bombarded with diet culture from all directions, and there’s a temptation to start being really critical of how we are “supposed to” look and how much space we are supposed to take up in this world. We all need reminding that this is all just a myth, and we are all not supposed to look the same. If you haven’t listened to our episode with Dana Suchow, “Raising Body Confident Kids” (episode #143), it’s a wonderful, refreshing dose of how we can instill a sense of self-love into our kids’ (and our own) mindframes.

2) This coming Monday’s episode is one I’ve wanted to record for awhile. I think in so many ways Adam and I are so open-minded and progressive. And yet when we recorded “we’re therapists now,” I was struck by our inherent discomfort when discussing kinks and fetishes. It’s simply not spoken about enough, and so there’s so much shame surrounding these topics. I don’t want it to be like this, though. We explore the history of kinks and fetishes in Monday’s episode, and why there’s so much secrecy and thoughts of it all being “deviant.” It’s a topic Adam and I both need more knowledge about, and I’m looking forward to the conversation. When I polled our instagram audience, here are some of the answers they gave:

  • Do you feel comfortable enough to tell your partner what you really want in the bedroom? 49% said “yes”

  • Is there something sexual you want to try with your partner that you are keeping secret because you are too nervous to talk about it? 26% said “yes”

  • Do you think your partner feels safe enough to discuss their true sexual desires with you? 70% said “mostly”

1) DATE NIGHT QUESTIONS!! (From our upcoming episode about kinks and fetishes) *To ask your partner and vice versa. These are meant to spark meaningful conversation, so please try to listen, inhale, exhale, and discuss. *THIS IS A SHAME-FREE ZONE*

  • Do you feel completely comfortable to share with me anything you’ve wanted to try in the bedroom that may not be part of our regular intimacy routine?

  • What is one sexual experience in (or out of) the bedroom you would be interested in learning more about, together?

  • What’s your biggest fear about trying something new in the bedroom and how could I make you feel more comfortable?

  • How can I make you feel more confident sexually?

For more prompts and questions for open and honest communication, plus bonding challenges and strategies for discussion, get our Date Night Questions Experience ebook.

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