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Moments of Reconnection and Boldness

5) “Stuff I Want You To Know Couples’ Challenge”

If you’re signed up for our emails, then you’ll be getting the very first Marriage and Martinis’ couples challenge in your inbox. We are really excited about it! The challenge will hopefully be a mixture of fun and bonding for couples. If you have not yet purchased the ebook, we highly recommend doing so in order to break the ice and get comfortable with the topic. We are offering a 15% off discount code in preparation for the challenge, “mnmchallenge.” Couples who have done parts of the ebook are probably more than warmed up to start the challenge. That being said, here are some simply laid out steps to walk you through the SIWYTK challenge!

  1. The challenge will be sent out Saturday, July 24th. This will give people over a week to look it over and familiarize yourself with the concept and goal, plus choose which topic you would like your partner to discover more about and vice versa.

  2. Once you’ve both decided on your topic for the other person, fill out the guidesheets (instructions are right on the challenge), and decide on a starting date and most importantly, a celebration date for the completion of the challenge (we will be officially starting it on August 1st).

  3. Periodically check our instagram stories to stay up to date on what the community is doing for the challenge and to share any of your questions or experiences with others.

  4. Keep an open mind and heart, and think of this as a little reconnection retreat without having to go anywhere.

4) It’s Time To Take The trip

If you listened to this past week’s podcast episode, “Temporary Getaways and Permanent Tattoos,” you heard Adam and me talk about how our recent four day trip to the tropical paradise of Brooklyn completely refreshed our relationship. Surviving a pandemic together had caused a deep feeling of monotony and a sort of “friendship style” rapport with one another. I don’t think either of us realized how much we needed this trip. Trust me, I know how logistically difficult booking even one night away can be (and one night is still worth it, by the way), between babysitting for the kids and pets, and the cost of travel and hotels. But at the same time that we all worry, can we afford to do it, another equally important question is, can we afford not to? Maybe the connection between Adam and I would have strengthened without this short vacation, but I really doubt it. So, this is my plea to you to go plan it. Book it. It really is that important. (**Obviously, where you live will impact travel and destinations. Always put safety first, and if you need to plan for months in the future, at least you’ll have something in the calendar to look forward to and plan for together).

3) A Moment of Audaciousness

I’ve spent my life making decisions with the underlying concern about what others might think. These outside voices have totally shaped the course of my life, both in positive and negative ways. I’ve wanted a tattoo for twenty years. I repressed the desire because I was too concerned about the thoughts of family and friends. But while we were away last week, I had a moment of audacity. I finally went and got the tattoo. For a brief period of time, all of those burdensome worries about what people will think, what my dad will think, and even what I will think in ten or twenty years, weren’t there. It was just Adam, me, and this bond of both doing something daring and only for us! So, will I regret it one day? Maybe. But I don’t think so. I think I’ll forever look down at this tattoo and remember that experience as one of the best days I’ve ever had. It’s a mark of bravery for me, personally, and proof that I can in fact make decisions for myself, even if it took 43 years for me to finally get here.

2) Tips and Strategies to “Do The Daring Thing!"

We all have at least one thing in life we really want to do, but there’s so much holding us back, whether it’s concerns such as judgment from others, fear of regret, or lack of confidence. Here are few ways to take that step you’ve been wanting to take for so long:

  1. Write down the thing and then speak it out loud into the world! That helps make it real and no longer just a thought that resides secretly only in your mind. Bonus points if you can speak it out loud to someone else! But even speaking it out into the void is a great start.

  2. Surround yourself with people who will be your biggest cheerleaders and have your back as you psych yourself up and prepare. Who are those people for you? Concentrate on them and drown out all the other noise.

  3. Consume content about people who have done daring things and achieved their dreams. Follow social media accounts, listen to podcasts and ted talks, and read books and articles that help light the fire within you and inspire you to take the leap.

  4. No regrets. If your dream or goal is something that does not harm another person, then what is there really to regret? A tattoo is a mark of a period in time and a reflection of something you once desired. An attempt at launching a business or new career comes with tons of life lessons whether it succeeds or is just the first step in a longer, somewhat bumpier pursuit. No matter what, you are ahead of everyone still waiting at the starting line. Be proud, be bold….you are a badass.

1) DATE NIGHT QUESTIONS - (Corresponding to this week’s episode, “Temporary Getaways and Permanent Tattoos”) *To ask your partner and vice versa. These are meant to spark meaningful conversation and communication, so please try to listen, inhale, exhale, and discuss. *THIS IS A SHAME-FREE ZONE* For more questions and conversation starters, check out our new Date Night Question Experience ebook!! (code “mnmchallenge” for 15% off)

- What is your favorite trip we’ve ever taken? What did you love so much about it? (be as specific as possible)

- Let’s say we start planning our next trip right now. Where do you picture us going, and what would you love to do while we’re there? (bonus points if you both start actually planning it)

- Is there a place that makes you think of us: a city, restaurant, beach, etc. that you associate with us and our relationship?

- What is something daring you would love to do together that you think would bond us?

- If you were going to do something daring and were to choose four people (not including your partner or kids if you have them) to be your support and encouragement crew, who would those people be (they can be public figures and/or people you know in real life)?

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